October 16, 2024

North Korean Leader Kim Jong Un Will Use His PUBG Skills To Feed His Starving Country

Pyongyang – North Korea State Media announced today that their country’s leader, Kim Jong Un has singlehandedly cured the country’s food crisis by playing PlayerUnknown Battlegrounds (PUBG). The wildly popular FPS game greets the last player still alive with a message stating “Winner Winner Chicken Dinner.” This had caused international concern as the game nor the game’s developer Blue Hole actually provide chicken dinners to winners but the country’s supreme leader could not be convinced otherwise. In a written statement, Kim Jong Un stated the following which was broadcasted on State Media:

“The American Capitalistic Dogs, want you to believe that I am an inferior PUBG player. They say this, because I have never lost. They say the chicken is not real, but that is untrue as thousands of chicken dinners have been enjoyed by our many citizens. I will continue to play PUBG and exchange our excess chicken dinners for fuel imports.”

Kim Jong Un is known world wide for his video game skills. For example, he beat Todd Roger’s phony Dragster score, beat Missile Command, and beat Darbian’s Super Mario Bros. speedrun record.