December 22, 2024

armor attack

As of this writing an Ohio man is attempting a 100 hour marathon on the arcade classic Armor Attack.

Gaming marathons, a staple of the competitive gaming community, have been around for decades.  The difficulty of such events is not always within the repetitive gameplay or the simple fatigue that would undoubtedly tear down the metal stability of the electronic athlete.  Instead it’s often the biological chores the human body must endure that will often end in premature defeat.

There is a variety of strategies marathoners use to remain focused including starvation, diapers, portable toilets, and more.  Some games allow extra lives to be banked, allowing the athlete to take a reasonable break to take care of business.

We here at the Gaming Free Press have a policy of respecting in-progress events and are not looking to interrupt the marathon but the question must be asked: is the challenge really about playing Armor Attack for 100 hours, or is it about holding your bowels for just as long?

A man, claiming to be a doctor unauthorized to speak on the matter requested anonymity when he called the Gaming Free Press tip line and shared the following:

“Human intestines are not designed for this type of irresponsible behavior.   The Armor Attack marathoner is risking serious injury or embarrassment if his intention is to hold it for 100 hours.  About 60 to 70 hours in you’ll hear a faint grunt, and that’s it, his bowels are gone.”

Let’s all wish the Ohio man the best of luck on his endeavor!  Share your comments below!