China Has Waited 15 Years To Kick Our Asses At Street Fighter

China’s Ministry of Culture announced that the 15 year ban on video game consoles, specifically foreign ones has finally ended.  What was originally an idea to curb the belief that video games effected the mental well-being of gamers has turned into an act of competitive revenge.

An anonymous spokesperson for the Defense Department cited unknown sources in China that the lifting of the ban is to coincide with the release of Street Fighter V.  The competitive fighting game has thrilled gamers for decades, and this latest incarnation is expected to set a few sales records.

But the real reason for the change of heart can be traced to the boom in nationalism and patriotism.  Economically China has grown exponentially over the past several decades.  They currently have the largest standing army in the world and hold much of the U.S. debt that as been incurred over the past 16 years.  They have also been nearly untouchable at the last several Olympic games – though some human rights activists believe that China use torturous exercises to train children into model athletes.

“Kicking American asses is as common as rice here in China,” explains Chang Xiandong a police officer raising a family of two boys in Shanghai.  “As soon as the people China join their first competitive event the Americans will fold just as fast as they did on the Iran deal.”