December 22, 2024

super smash brosWoman Crushes Smash Bros. Competition, Will Use Breasts To Dominate In Street Fighter V

Birmingham Alabama resident Susan Radius thought her life was over three years ago after she lost both of her arms in a freak train accident brought on after abusing meth.  But after months of rehabilitation Susan has turned her life around and has won her first Smash Bros. tournament using only her breasts:

“My boyfriend played the game all the time, and one day he set the WiiU controller down on the coffee table,” explains Susan on a phone call with the Gaming Free Press, “I leaned forward and learned that the wide controller was perfect to control with my breasts.”

Susan participated in a local tournament at a video game, comic book, and trading card store that was hosting the Super Smash Bros. Tournament.  Participants were amazed and sometimes offended by the violent and often grotesque display of Susan’s d-cups slapping the controller as she shook her chest vigorously.  It was reported that she almost got disqualified a few times after her nipples grazed the home button essentially pausing the game.  Regardless, she placed 1st.

With one tournament in the bag Susan has promised to participate in more:

“I got a chance to play around with one of those arcade sticks they use for Street Fighter.  I think I’ll buy one and start practicing for Street Fighter V tournaments.”